There will be blood
by frojoassassin
Summary: So Part 3 of New Girl yay I guess it has the same characters from the last one except two new ones two new small ones. Missy's pregnant, Garmadons pissed off , Offendermans a pervert, Trenderman is trendier than ever , Coles father and Lloyd's an uncle and what did Slendy say?
1. Chapter 1: chasin Cole

Part 3 people! Who's excited if you are good! Yay! Lately I've been so bored so I was busy if anyone cares why I was gone anyway so yeah part 3 of (what should I call the whole series?) whatever the series is called  
Oh btw guys I have youtube yay yeah no one gives a shit  
My POV  
My dad is crazy so far Cole has hopped fences jumped in pools and fell in the mud and my dad hasn't stopped  
So I should just chase after him  
Me: Offenderman!  
Offendy: let's go girl!  
I hopped on his back and teleported to him  
I tackled my dad  
Dad: Missy get off of me  
Me: leave Cole alone!  
Dad: no aren't you mad!  
Me: no I'm not  
Dad: you could have said that before I socked him in the face  
Me: you mother fucker!  
Dad: sorry Cole  
Cole: it hurt but it's okay  
Dad: what kind of gender is it  
Me: it's to small for that  
Cole: let's hope it's two boys  
Me: yeah  
Offendy: where the hell are we at  
Me: the park I think  
Offendy: let's get shots  
LordG: I'm down with that  
Me: let's of get shots then  
After getting shots

If you not drunk ladies & gentlemen  
Get ready to get fucked up  
Let's do it, Ha Ha  
ColeZaneKaiOffendy  
You know what  
Lil Jay  
Yeah  
All of the alcoholics  
Where you at  
Let's go

When I walk in the club  
All eyes on me  
I'm with the party rock crew  
All drinks are free  
We like ciroc  
We love patrone  
We came to party rock  
Everybody it's on  
Shots shots shots shots shots shots  
Shots shots shots shots shots  
Shots shots shots shots shots  
Everybody [x2]  
The ladies love us  
When we pour shots  
They need an excuse  
To suck our cocks  
We came to get crunk  
How 'bout you?  
Bottles up  
Let's go round two  
Shots shots shots shots shots shots  
Shots shots shots shots shots  
Shots shots shots shots shots  
Everybody [x2]  
If you ain't getting drunk get the fuck out the club  
If you ain't takin' shots get the fuck out the club  
If you ain't come to party get the fuck out the club  
Now where my alcoholics let me see ya hands up  
What you drinkin on?  
Jaegerbombs  
Lemondrops  
Buttery Nipples  
Jello Shots  
Kamikaze  
Three Wise Men  
Fuck all that shit  
Get me some Gin

Patrone's on the rocks and I'm ready for some shots  
The women come around everytime I'm pourin' shots  
Their panties hit the ground everytime I give em shots  
So cups in the air, everybody let's take shots.  
If you feelin' drunk put ya hands in the air  
And If you tryin' to fuck put ya hands in the air  
Now say "I'm fucked up" (I'm fucked up)  
I'm fucked up (I'm fucked up)  
I'm tryna fuck (I'm tryna fuck)  
I'm tryna fuck (I'm tryna fuck)  
Shots  
Patrone's on the rocks and I'm ready for some shots  
The women come around everytime I'm pourin' shots  
Their panties hit the ground everytime I give em shots  
So cups in the air, everybody let's take shots.  
I'm fucked up  
La dad a da  
La dad a dad a da [x8]


	2. Chapter 2: What does the fox say (once)

Hey guys I'm back oh by the way the baby can't taste shots,beer, and cum. (Yeah that's so unrealistic and gross)  
I brought cum up because yeah Missy sucked Coles (yeah)  
Cole: I'm still drunk as fuck  
Missy: me too  
Cole: where's Offenderman at?  
Missy: yeah where the hell is he  
Offenderman: right here  
He was naked  
Missy: oh were you watching us  
Offenderman: yeah  
Missy: that's fine I don't care  
Offenderman: first time I ever heard that  
Cole: it must've been a lot then  
Offenderman: yeah but I'm staying here though  
Jeff: okay people get the fuck up  
Cole: I HAVE TO PEE!  
He ran to the bathroom  
Jeff: oh btw Missy the police called and I think it's the police from Vegas  
Me: FUCK!  
Jeff: yeah and you have to pay a 1,000 dollar fine  
Me: no problem  
Jeff: that's a little strange but okay  
Me: does anyone have bacon  
Jeff: why  
Me: I need some kind of meat  
Jeff: oh there should be bacon in the fridge  
Me: YAY!  
Kai crashed into the door randomly  
Kai: *nosebleeding* Missy where's your shirt?  
Missy: what is there a problem  
Kai: nope not a problem at all *smiles*  
Lloyd: I WANN SEE YOUR PECOCK!  
Me: what the hell!  
Lloyd: what you jealous of my swagger jagger  
Me: not much to be jealous of  
Lloyd: hater  
Lloyd walked into the door  
Me: oh that doors not open (obviously)  
Lloyd: yeah right  
He opened the door then walked through it  
Why was Lloyd even walking to the garage anyway  
He's probably drunk  
So I had my bacon I was just watching soul eater I didn't realize but death the kid is pretty hot  
Cole: DAY AND NIGHT MY LONLEY BONER SOMETHING SOMETHING SOMETHING  
Me:I pretty sure that's not how the song goes  
Cole: oh thatll be weird  
Jay:what does the fox say?!  
Lloyd: I dunno  
Kai hopped up  
Kai: ring ding ding dig ding ding ding  
Jay: um ok then  
Jeff: the question is what does Slendy say  
We all started at him •_• BAD ASS PARODY (if anyone make one like that tell me and make sure to put my name or say I got it from fanfiction)  
Me: that'll be awesome  
Cole: yeah that would anyway we need to go sing  
Me: we should that'll be so fucking fun  
Lloyd: yeah KAROKE!  
Jay: where though  
Me: I dunno  
Cole was texting  
Cole: AHHH FUCK YOU!  
Me: when and where  
Cole: right here right now wait- um my dad is coming over  
Me: oh shit  
Cole: I haven't even told him  
that I'm gonna be a dad  
Jay: we'll that really fucked up your relationship  
Cole: oh gee thanks  
Kai: where's Nya at she can't be mad this long  
Me: damn she really must've hate me then  
Kai: don't say that we'll how can she hate you have you seen your tits!  
Me:•••  
Kai: she could be jealous though  
Jay: LANDON! (Remember Jays son)  
Kai: fuck you Jay! *cries*  
Me: we'll then  
Jay: who gives a fuck now anyway to the Karoke place!  
Me: where is it at  
Zane: I'll look one up

Me: Zane stop looking up porn!  
Zane: fine  
(I had to at least put something about pornstar on here)  
Zane: oh there's one in the Quad (like a town square...quadrilateral •3•)  
Me: oh let's go then  
Lloyd: you should go change then (he's very protective now)  
Jay: or don't  
WHOA JAY WAS HITTIN ON MISSY \•()•/  
Me: what  
Jay: nothing •~•  
Me: okay let's go (she ain't changing)  
IN THE CAR  
me: get your (dat d) tentacle off my leg  
Offenderman: I'll leave it on  
Me: fine  
Jay: let's Go and sing ing let's I get away (starships)  
Cole: lock eyes from across the van just trying to hit Offenderman take your hand and skip the names no need for the silly games make my way through the crowd your vjjs the sky and I want dem clouds (jizz in my pants)  
Lloyd: whoa that escalated quickly  
Kai: we'll yeah it's Cole what do you expect?

Anyway guys end of the story see ya guys joking I'm stupid  
Okay for real though please reveiw and favorite and all that crap  
Which song should they sing  
PLEASE COMMENT(list or just one person)


	3. Chapter 3: Karoke

Hey guys I'm back sorry for the long wait but none of you commented (I know why) and that's totally fine after all there is deviant art anyway back to the story  
We were all driving to the Karaoke place and just I was just staring at the clouds. Offendermans dick was still on my leg but I was fine with it (who wouldn't be fine with it).  
Me: *yawn*  
Cole: I'm bored  
Me: let's sing  
Cole: okay  
Me: set fire to your hair  
Cole: but I like my hair  
Me: •_• ...I like your hair too  
Offenderman: it's very fluffy  
Cole: why thank you  
Lloyd turned around.  
Lloyd: are we gonna sing or what?  
Cole: oh yeah  
Lately I've been I've been losing sleep  
Offenderman: dreaming about the things that we don't need  
Cole: *sigh* okay let's sing a faster song  
Offenderman: dog goes woof  
Jay: cat goes meow  
Kai: bird goes tweet and the mouse goes squeak  
Lloyd: What does the fox say!  
I rolled my eyes. My brother can be so weird sometimes.  
Cole: *whipping hair* ring ding ding ding ding dig ding ding ding gering ding ding ing ding  
Offenderman: did you drink before you can here  
Cole: no I'm just hyper  
Offenderman: oh that's normal for you  
Zane stopped the car.  
Zane: were here  
We all got out of the car. We walked into the Karaoke place we were the only ones there  
Me: I'm going first  
Cole: duet  
Offenderman: *smirks* I thought you guys already did it  
Cole: *blush* oh stop  
He whispers something I to offenderman  
Offenderman nods and smiles  
Me: anyway let's go  
We both got on stage and grabbed the microphones  
Cole: change it to number 3  
The dj nodded.  
The music started.  
Cole:  
So I got my boots on,  
Got the right amount of leather  
And I'm doing me up with a black colored liner  
And I'm working my strut but I know it don't matter  
All we need in this world is some love  
Me:  
There's a thin line 'tween the dark side,  
And the light side, baby tonight  
It's a struggle, gotta rumble, tryin'a find it  
Me&Cole:  
[Chorus:]  
But if I had you,  
That would be the only thing I'd ever need  
Yeah if I had you,  
The money, fame and fortune never could compete  
If I had you,  
Life would be a party, it'd be ecstasy  
Yeah, if I had you  
Y-y-y-y-you y-y-y-y-y-you y-y-y-y-y-you  
If I had you  
Cole:  
From New York to LA getting high, rock and rolling  
Get a room trash it up 'til it's ten in the morning  
Girls in stripper heels, boys rolling in Maserati's  
What they need in this world is some love  
There's a thin line 'tween the wild time,  
And a flat-line, baby tonight  
It's a struggle gotta rumble, tryin'a find it  
Me&Cole:  
[Chorus:]  
But if I had you,  
That would be the only thing I'd ever need  
Yeah if I had you,  
The money, fame and fortune never could compete  
If I had you,  
Life would be a party, it'd be ecstasy  
Yeah, if I had you  
Y-y-y-y-you y-y-y-y-y-you y-y-y-y-y-you  
If I had-  
Me:  
The flashing of the lights  
It might feel so good  
But I got you stuck on my mind, yeah  
The fashion and the stage, it might get me high  
But it don't mean a thing tonight  
Cole:  
That would be the only thing I'd ever need  
Yeah if I had you,  
The money, fame and fortune never could compete  
If I had you,  
Life would be a party it'd be ecstasy  
Yeah if I had you  
Y-y-y-y-you y-y-y-y-y-you y-y-y-y-y-you  
If I had you  
Cole:  
That would be the only thing I'd ever need  
Yeah if I had you,  
The money, fame and fortune never could compete  
(Never could compete with you)  
If I had you, life would be a party, it'd be ecstasy  
(It'd be ecstasy with you)  
Yeah if I had you  
Y-y-y-y-you y-y-y-y-y-you y-y-y-y-y-you  
If I had you.


End file.
